....you know what?
Things are never going to be perfect.
Sometimes I feel like everything in my life has to be neat, ordered, in its box. And I get anxious because it's just not like that (when is it ever?!!)
The truth is, I am quite a scatty, disorganised person. I'm impusive, happy-go-lucky, and I like living life to the full.
So.....sure there is stuff that needs to be improved. Stuff I can do right now which will make me feel good & less anxious. Especially stuff to do with money.
But all I can do is that, really. Still live life to the full....just maybe with more a degree of caution? More....sensible. I need to drink less, think of my health. I need to eat more healthily.....it may effect my future health. I'm nearly 31! I guess we've all got to grow up sometime.....
So! Here it begins.
Monday, 7 June 2010
The future and minor things like that
So!
I think it's time to do a little assessment of stuff.
I did this way back in 2002 when I felt a bit all over the place. I feel a bit like that now. I can't shake the vague sense of anxiety which is always lurking in the background....and I don't know why.
A lot of it is to do with money, sure. It's the source of most stress round here!
I just need to figure some stuff out..........I guess here is the place to do it.
Stuff that's good
1) Happy, healthy, bright children (touch wood)
2) Strong marriage - we feel like a team
3) Lovely big house - may not be ours but all the space is FAB. Long term let!
4) Near my ma & pa
5) Mike in secure, permanent, well-paid job
6) Now I'm working 2 days a week, I can pay for my outgoings! And have some left over....it's also good to be using my brain once again....
7) Fab social life - loads of lovely friends here & scattered all over the country!
Stuff I think needs improving/doing
1) Need to shift about half a stone
2) Need to do more exercise
3) Need to eat more healthily - eating waaaay too much bad stuff at the mo - need to have 5 a day fruit & veg! Less sat. fat!
4) Money - as always. We're getting there. But our finances still feel like such a mess! I need to keep track of my spending more & not be so crazy.
5) Children's sweet treats should only really be at the weekend
6) Probably need to drink less booze at the weekend - binge drinking is my speciality
Desires for future
1) Find solid, dependable childcare I'm happy with for September for both children, 2 days a week
2) Be a healthy eater who enjoys treats OCCASIONALLY!!!
3) Go on a family holiday once a year - pref. abroad
4) Remember friends and families birthdays and send cards!
Long term
1) Buy house
2) Travel the world
3) Be rich (haha)
4) Go to Ibiza (!!!)
Action plan
1) Eat 5 a day - fruit & veg - starting after Butlins
2) After Butlins start weightwatchers to lose half a stone
3) Find a class to do once a week - Step?
4) Start childcare search - this week
5) Can we afford holiday this year or next? Work it out...
Money
1) Every month, transfer our disposable income into joint account.
2) Check account every other day.
3) NO MORE CHARGES!
4) Could I do some tutoring or something to help clear my debts? Capital One = £800
5) Check Topshop all clear.....
6) Set a weekly budget for me
Ooh! I feel so much better having done that.
I think it's time to do a little assessment of stuff.
I did this way back in 2002 when I felt a bit all over the place. I feel a bit like that now. I can't shake the vague sense of anxiety which is always lurking in the background....and I don't know why.
A lot of it is to do with money, sure. It's the source of most stress round here!
I just need to figure some stuff out..........I guess here is the place to do it.
Stuff that's good
1) Happy, healthy, bright children (touch wood)
2) Strong marriage - we feel like a team
3) Lovely big house - may not be ours but all the space is FAB. Long term let!
4) Near my ma & pa
5) Mike in secure, permanent, well-paid job
6) Now I'm working 2 days a week, I can pay for my outgoings! And have some left over....it's also good to be using my brain once again....
7) Fab social life - loads of lovely friends here & scattered all over the country!
Stuff I think needs improving/doing
1) Need to shift about half a stone
2) Need to do more exercise
3) Need to eat more healthily - eating waaaay too much bad stuff at the mo - need to have 5 a day fruit & veg! Less sat. fat!
4) Money - as always. We're getting there. But our finances still feel like such a mess! I need to keep track of my spending more & not be so crazy.
5) Children's sweet treats should only really be at the weekend
6) Probably need to drink less booze at the weekend - binge drinking is my speciality
Desires for future
1) Find solid, dependable childcare I'm happy with for September for both children, 2 days a week
2) Be a healthy eater who enjoys treats OCCASIONALLY!!!
3) Go on a family holiday once a year - pref. abroad
4) Remember friends and families birthdays and send cards!
Long term
1) Buy house
2) Travel the world
3) Be rich (haha)
4) Go to Ibiza (!!!)
Action plan
1) Eat 5 a day - fruit & veg - starting after Butlins
2) After Butlins start weightwatchers to lose half a stone
3) Find a class to do once a week - Step?
4) Start childcare search - this week
5) Can we afford holiday this year or next? Work it out...
Money
1) Every month, transfer our disposable income into joint account.
2) Check account every other day.
3) NO MORE CHARGES!
4) Could I do some tutoring or something to help clear my debts? Capital One = £800
5) Check Topshop all clear.....
6) Set a weekly budget for me
Ooh! I feel so much better having done that.
Thursday, 15 April 2010
Hmmmmm
Yo yo,
Well it's 12.35pm on a sunny Thursday spring afternoon and William and I have just eaten 5 sausages between us for lunch! We're now watching 3rd & Bird (I HATE this programme....)Sophie is asleep in her buggy in the playroom. Ahhhhh!
We've had such a lovely morning! William and I baked a banana cake for the first time which was absolutely delicious!! I really enjoy baking with William and he absolutely loves it, it's such a fun thing to do together! Then William and I played a pretend cafe game - we made a menu and everything & served his toy cats some play food! Really fun! I read Sophie lots of books so she wasn't too left out. It will be great when she's a little older & we can enjoy these games (and baking!) all together!
The whole Easter break has been great fun actually - it's flown by! Easter weekend was lovely - 'Grad' (Mike's dad Bob) was here and we did lots of fun things like eating out for lunch. Last weekend we went to stay in a cottage in Stroud with lots of our friends and had an absolute blast! We took the kids to a couple of new soft play places and parks which they loved! And this week we've been to the library, visited my friend Sarah in Sturry and played in their massive garden.........it's been great!
The only cloud in all of this fun has been our dreadful financial situation. In a nutshell: we had to ask my brother for a loan of £2K to get ourselves out of the mess we're in and we're waiting desperately for it to clear. What a mess! It's so embarassing. This is never, EVER happening again. We now have a master financial spreadsheet of all our outgoings/incomings and we're keeping track. It is such a relief that from next month we will have a second income - we really, REALLY need it now.
Speaking of which.......I start my new job on Monday!!! ooh, my tummy just did a nervous flip when I wrote that! Eek! Actually, I feel ok about it. Had some serious wobbles earlier in the week - including 1 night when I was awake worrying about it for ages and was actually having nightmares about it! But I made a spreadsheet of all the days I would be working and asked Mike to find out which days he could look after the children, and he can do 9 days!!!! That's loads more than I was expecting!! So I feel more relaxed about it, I think. I'm sure I'll be absolutely bricking it on Sunday, not to mention Monday morning - but I've just got to take a deep breath and get on with it. I'm a good teacher, I think, and I get such a buzz from it - just got to try & focus on that.
I just wish I knew if they were expecting me to do Friday afternoons. That's a whole other issue which I haven't planned for at all!
So, after Sophie wakes up from her nap I think we're going to go out for a walk along the seafront, and in to town to get a few bits & pieces! Feel quite sleepy now but need to stay all energetic....!
Well it's 12.35pm on a sunny Thursday spring afternoon and William and I have just eaten 5 sausages between us for lunch! We're now watching 3rd & Bird (I HATE this programme....)Sophie is asleep in her buggy in the playroom. Ahhhhh!
We've had such a lovely morning! William and I baked a banana cake for the first time which was absolutely delicious!! I really enjoy baking with William and he absolutely loves it, it's such a fun thing to do together! Then William and I played a pretend cafe game - we made a menu and everything & served his toy cats some play food! Really fun! I read Sophie lots of books so she wasn't too left out. It will be great when she's a little older & we can enjoy these games (and baking!) all together!
The whole Easter break has been great fun actually - it's flown by! Easter weekend was lovely - 'Grad' (Mike's dad Bob) was here and we did lots of fun things like eating out for lunch. Last weekend we went to stay in a cottage in Stroud with lots of our friends and had an absolute blast! We took the kids to a couple of new soft play places and parks which they loved! And this week we've been to the library, visited my friend Sarah in Sturry and played in their massive garden.........it's been great!
The only cloud in all of this fun has been our dreadful financial situation. In a nutshell: we had to ask my brother for a loan of £2K to get ourselves out of the mess we're in and we're waiting desperately for it to clear. What a mess! It's so embarassing. This is never, EVER happening again. We now have a master financial spreadsheet of all our outgoings/incomings and we're keeping track. It is such a relief that from next month we will have a second income - we really, REALLY need it now.
Speaking of which.......I start my new job on Monday!!! ooh, my tummy just did a nervous flip when I wrote that! Eek! Actually, I feel ok about it. Had some serious wobbles earlier in the week - including 1 night when I was awake worrying about it for ages and was actually having nightmares about it! But I made a spreadsheet of all the days I would be working and asked Mike to find out which days he could look after the children, and he can do 9 days!!!! That's loads more than I was expecting!! So I feel more relaxed about it, I think. I'm sure I'll be absolutely bricking it on Sunday, not to mention Monday morning - but I've just got to take a deep breath and get on with it. I'm a good teacher, I think, and I get such a buzz from it - just got to try & focus on that.
I just wish I knew if they were expecting me to do Friday afternoons. That's a whole other issue which I haven't planned for at all!
So, after Sophie wakes up from her nap I think we're going to go out for a walk along the seafront, and in to town to get a few bits & pieces! Feel quite sleepy now but need to stay all energetic....!
Monday, 29 March 2010
Work
Hey hey! I know I haven't written in here for yonks but there's lots of stuff going on at the mo & I need to try & make sense of it by writing it down!
So my lovely, lovely children are now 3 and a half (William) and 1 and a half (Sophie). William's been going to nursery 5 mornings a week since last September (he LOVES it!) and he is starting school in September. Sophie is the most outgoing, confident little girl you can imagine and is very very different to how William was at 18 months - he was clingy and needy and wouldn't let me leave his side!!!
So a couple of months ago I realised that after 4 years of being at home I was ready for a change. It was always in my mind to return to work part time at some point, I just wasn't sure when. I miss teaching, I really do, and I miss using my brain. I was never destined to be Housewife of the Year (HATE housework!). Plus our money situation is dire. Me being a home for 4 years has been hard. I am crap at going without stuff and generally like nice things - like going out for lunch as a family at the weekend!
I was casually browsing job websites and came across a 2 day a week teaching job in an infant school in Broadstairs. I ummmed and aaaahhhed about applying but Mike and my mum were totally for it and persuaded me to go for it. I got an interview (which I secretly wanted to get!), had to teach a 20 minute lesson on pirates to a year 2 class, really enjoyed it! Then....I got offered the job!!! Throughout the whole interview & waiting process I had to admit to myself that I did really want the job and was thrilled when I got it!
It's only since that the doubts have really set in. The whole reality of leaving my kids for 2 days a week. Searching for a childminder - something I subconciously vowed I'd never have to do. I was always passionate about being at home wth my kids and not palming them off on anyone else - so it was like changing my whole belief system. I still believe in not going back to work when babies are very small though - and I would never work full time til both my children are at school. But I still can't believe I'm going to be a (semi) working mum.
The anxiety has been getting worse. I start 3 weeks today. My mum, dad and Mike are going to share the childcare until September (am hoping /assuming this job will carry on next academic year....). So the children will not be left with a 'stranger' until they are 2 & 4 respectively - and William will be at school. But still. I am already wracked with guilt. I feel so guilty about so many other aspects of parenting - too much TV, too much chocolate, not enough attention cos I have to do chores....etc etc....so this is just something else to make me feel rubbish! Is it worth it?!
I need to do pros and cons.
PROS
*Only 2 days a week (they want me to do Fri afternoons as well, am going to have to tell them no...) So 5 days a week I will be with them.
* Will be here in all school holidays
* School day finishes at 3pm so I can try & leave as soon as possible afterwards
* Money is the big thing - finances are in such a state. More comfortable lifestyle, no more nasty letters from the bank. Nice holidays. Finally saving for a house! Being able to get really nice food for the kids, fun family weekends and lots of daytrips and stuff in the holidays.
* I get to read/drink coffee on the train!
* I love teaching & miss it
CONS
* Leaving my children. I will leave them early (7.15am-ish) on those 2 days. 2 whole days of not seeing them, playing with them. Someone else will be picking William up those 2 days from school, and Sophie from nursery. Will it affect them? How can I trust the childminder?
I JUST DON'T KNOW! Help.........
So my lovely, lovely children are now 3 and a half (William) and 1 and a half (Sophie). William's been going to nursery 5 mornings a week since last September (he LOVES it!) and he is starting school in September. Sophie is the most outgoing, confident little girl you can imagine and is very very different to how William was at 18 months - he was clingy and needy and wouldn't let me leave his side!!!
So a couple of months ago I realised that after 4 years of being at home I was ready for a change. It was always in my mind to return to work part time at some point, I just wasn't sure when. I miss teaching, I really do, and I miss using my brain. I was never destined to be Housewife of the Year (HATE housework!). Plus our money situation is dire. Me being a home for 4 years has been hard. I am crap at going without stuff and generally like nice things - like going out for lunch as a family at the weekend!
I was casually browsing job websites and came across a 2 day a week teaching job in an infant school in Broadstairs. I ummmed and aaaahhhed about applying but Mike and my mum were totally for it and persuaded me to go for it. I got an interview (which I secretly wanted to get!), had to teach a 20 minute lesson on pirates to a year 2 class, really enjoyed it! Then....I got offered the job!!! Throughout the whole interview & waiting process I had to admit to myself that I did really want the job and was thrilled when I got it!
It's only since that the doubts have really set in. The whole reality of leaving my kids for 2 days a week. Searching for a childminder - something I subconciously vowed I'd never have to do. I was always passionate about being at home wth my kids and not palming them off on anyone else - so it was like changing my whole belief system. I still believe in not going back to work when babies are very small though - and I would never work full time til both my children are at school. But I still can't believe I'm going to be a (semi) working mum.
The anxiety has been getting worse. I start 3 weeks today. My mum, dad and Mike are going to share the childcare until September (am hoping /assuming this job will carry on next academic year....). So the children will not be left with a 'stranger' until they are 2 & 4 respectively - and William will be at school. But still. I am already wracked with guilt. I feel so guilty about so many other aspects of parenting - too much TV, too much chocolate, not enough attention cos I have to do chores....etc etc....so this is just something else to make me feel rubbish! Is it worth it?!
I need to do pros and cons.
PROS
*Only 2 days a week (they want me to do Fri afternoons as well, am going to have to tell them no...) So 5 days a week I will be with them.
* Will be here in all school holidays
* School day finishes at 3pm so I can try & leave as soon as possible afterwards
* Money is the big thing - finances are in such a state. More comfortable lifestyle, no more nasty letters from the bank. Nice holidays. Finally saving for a house! Being able to get really nice food for the kids, fun family weekends and lots of daytrips and stuff in the holidays.
* I get to read/drink coffee on the train!
* I love teaching & miss it
CONS
* Leaving my children. I will leave them early (7.15am-ish) on those 2 days. 2 whole days of not seeing them, playing with them. Someone else will be picking William up those 2 days from school, and Sophie from nursery. Will it affect them? How can I trust the childminder?
I JUST DON'T KNOW! Help.........
Tuesday, 3 November 2009
I'm BACK!!!
Heeeeey! I'm back! No-one will be reading this but I really don't care! In fact I need to change the title...Pregnancy & Toddler Mayhem is no longer appropriate, I'm not pregnant and I now have a preschooler and a toddler!!!
Anyway....I'm well out of the black void I fell into over a year ago! And enjoying life with William (now 3!) and Sophie (14 months!!!). Looking forward to writing in here.....:-)
Anyway....I'm well out of the black void I fell into over a year ago! And enjoying life with William (now 3!) and Sophie (14 months!!!). Looking forward to writing in here.....:-)
Thursday, 25 September 2008
black void
I feel like I've fallen into a black void and can't get out. I've never felt so low. I'm crying even as I write this.
What's gone wrong? I feel inadequate, like I'm not looking after Sophie properly. Although I know deep down I am. I feel like I'm neglecting William-even though I'm spending ages playing with him every day. I wake up with a sense of dread about the day, every day. I feel like there's nothing to look forward to - every night I fall asleep on the sofa about 9pm, before Mike and I can even think about watching some TV. I'm sick of expressing, sterilising, washing up. The house is a mess. I have no appetite and can't even be bothered to wash my hair or put on make up. So I'm a mess too.
I'm totally shutting Mike out. I don't know how to explain how I'm feeling - would anyone understand? I'm lonely and need a support network here in Herne Bay like I had in maidenhead.
I honestly don't know how I've fallen into this black void. But I need to know how to get out.
What's gone wrong? I feel inadequate, like I'm not looking after Sophie properly. Although I know deep down I am. I feel like I'm neglecting William-even though I'm spending ages playing with him every day. I wake up with a sense of dread about the day, every day. I feel like there's nothing to look forward to - every night I fall asleep on the sofa about 9pm, before Mike and I can even think about watching some TV. I'm sick of expressing, sterilising, washing up. The house is a mess. I have no appetite and can't even be bothered to wash my hair or put on make up. So I'm a mess too.
I'm totally shutting Mike out. I don't know how to explain how I'm feeling - would anyone understand? I'm lonely and need a support network here in Herne Bay like I had in maidenhead.
I honestly don't know how I've fallen into this black void. But I need to know how to get out.
Monday, 22 September 2008
Big Fat Failure.com
My oh my, what a 3 weeks it's been! Sophie is now 3 weeks old, having made her appearance in dramatic fashion on the 1st September at 4.44pm in the back of an ambulance....more about that in another entry!!!
I need to write here about her feeding problems. It's making me so sad and I'm not sure how I'm going to get over it.
I was determined to breastfeed Sophie from the start as I had big problems with William and ended up expressing for him for nearly 6 months. In the ambulance after delivery she latched on and all was great - she had another big feed in hospital and I couldn't believe it was actually working! This carried on the first few days and although it take a while every time to get her latched on due to my flat nipples, she managed it for the most part. I wasn't really enjoying it -it was soooo sore - but was really pleased to be breastfeeding the conventional way!
However, on Friday 5th everything went very wrong - I got terrible baby blues and then mastitis kicked in with a vengeance. I had chills and a fever and even missed the big brother final because I was feeling so ill & miserable!! Early on Saturday morning Sophie refused to latch on to the affected breast because it was so engorged, and we had to give her expressed milk in a bottle - which upset me at the time as I hadn't wanted to use bottles until she was a month old.
On Saturday I felt increasingly ill and the midwife sent me to the hospital to get some antibiotics. But they didn't kick in until Monday so the rest of the weekend was horrendous as it spread to both breasts. Sophie then refused to latch onto either side so it was expressed milk in a botte again - it all felt very familiar.
In a nutshell - I began to feel better that following week but Sophie still wouldn't latch so I hired my hospital grade pump and began expressing every 3 hours, like I did with William. But it wasn't quite enough for her every feed so we had to introduce some formula at night - which again made me feel like a big fat failure, I'd wanted to avoid formula until 6 months.
However. Disaster struck yet again later that week when the mastitis came back. I spent another weekend feeling hideous with fever, chills, the whole shebang, and my milk supply began to completely dwindle. I can't remember the last time I felt that ill.
Eventually I couldn't get any milk out of my right side at all - with pump or hand. I still can't. I can express about an ounce and a half from the other side-but that's nothing compared to what I used to get when I expressed for William. I've been desperately trying to get my milk supply up but nothing's working. It took until Thursday to feel better - so that's 12 days of horrible illness.
So Sophie, my beautiful baby daughter, is being mostly formula fed, with a bit of breastmilk on the side. I still feel devastated about this. It's not what I planned at all. I'm not anti formula but I know breastmilk is best. I feel like I've totally failed her by not being able to give her what she deserves. I know it's not my fault - the horrible mastitis ruined everything. But it's going to take me some time to come to terms with this. I feel horribly jealous of people who can breastfeed easily. Why the fuck did I have such problems, both times? Why the fuck did I have to get such severe mastitis?? It's so unfair.
I know Sophie will be fine on formula. She's an unbelievable content baby (touch wood). But it's formula - it's artificial. Breastmilk is so natural. William, at least, guzzled 6 months of breastmilk - albeit from a bottle.
So that's why I'm sad. I've cried so much over this. No point crying now as what's done is done. But like I said, it will be a while before I come to terms with this.
I need to write here about her feeding problems. It's making me so sad and I'm not sure how I'm going to get over it.
I was determined to breastfeed Sophie from the start as I had big problems with William and ended up expressing for him for nearly 6 months. In the ambulance after delivery she latched on and all was great - she had another big feed in hospital and I couldn't believe it was actually working! This carried on the first few days and although it take a while every time to get her latched on due to my flat nipples, she managed it for the most part. I wasn't really enjoying it -it was soooo sore - but was really pleased to be breastfeeding the conventional way!
However, on Friday 5th everything went very wrong - I got terrible baby blues and then mastitis kicked in with a vengeance. I had chills and a fever and even missed the big brother final because I was feeling so ill & miserable!! Early on Saturday morning Sophie refused to latch on to the affected breast because it was so engorged, and we had to give her expressed milk in a bottle - which upset me at the time as I hadn't wanted to use bottles until she was a month old.
On Saturday I felt increasingly ill and the midwife sent me to the hospital to get some antibiotics. But they didn't kick in until Monday so the rest of the weekend was horrendous as it spread to both breasts. Sophie then refused to latch onto either side so it was expressed milk in a botte again - it all felt very familiar.
In a nutshell - I began to feel better that following week but Sophie still wouldn't latch so I hired my hospital grade pump and began expressing every 3 hours, like I did with William. But it wasn't quite enough for her every feed so we had to introduce some formula at night - which again made me feel like a big fat failure, I'd wanted to avoid formula until 6 months.
However. Disaster struck yet again later that week when the mastitis came back. I spent another weekend feeling hideous with fever, chills, the whole shebang, and my milk supply began to completely dwindle. I can't remember the last time I felt that ill.
Eventually I couldn't get any milk out of my right side at all - with pump or hand. I still can't. I can express about an ounce and a half from the other side-but that's nothing compared to what I used to get when I expressed for William. I've been desperately trying to get my milk supply up but nothing's working. It took until Thursday to feel better - so that's 12 days of horrible illness.
So Sophie, my beautiful baby daughter, is being mostly formula fed, with a bit of breastmilk on the side. I still feel devastated about this. It's not what I planned at all. I'm not anti formula but I know breastmilk is best. I feel like I've totally failed her by not being able to give her what she deserves. I know it's not my fault - the horrible mastitis ruined everything. But it's going to take me some time to come to terms with this. I feel horribly jealous of people who can breastfeed easily. Why the fuck did I have such problems, both times? Why the fuck did I have to get such severe mastitis?? It's so unfair.
I know Sophie will be fine on formula. She's an unbelievable content baby (touch wood). But it's formula - it's artificial. Breastmilk is so natural. William, at least, guzzled 6 months of breastmilk - albeit from a bottle.
So that's why I'm sad. I've cried so much over this. No point crying now as what's done is done. But like I said, it will be a while before I come to terms with this.
Wednesday, 27 August 2008
Happy 39 weeks, fat face
39 weeks! I can't believe I've made it this far. I feel really content about everything today. Like - it's going to happen soon, so there's no point getting impatient. My only morbid fear is going waaaaaay over my due date and having to be induced. Having to remain in bed through the pain of contractions without moving around, rocking on my birthing ball etc. would be my idea of hell.
There's no signs anything's going to happen yet. Last night the baby was kicking me so hard and wriggling so frantically I thought something might be happening, but no cigar. I had a crap night's sleep though and really should be napping now to catch up. I have the odd cramp here and there, and frequent BHs, but.....that's it. I now have faint stretchmarks appearing under my belly button - escaped getting any with William, so I'm not too chuffed about that.
My face is massive. I appear to have stored fat for breastfeeding in two main places: my thighs, which are absolutely GINORMOUS and my face. I look like I'm storing nuts in my cheeks for winter, like a squirrel. Seriously!
My lovely husband went back to work today after a fantastic week and a half off! We did lots of lovely family things last week. It was so much fun to sit around in the morning, drinking tea, eating shortbread and watching the olympics whilst playing with William. It was William's 2nd birthday yesterday, which was fab except for a minor blip when he appeared to be scared of the mickey mouse cuddly toy we got him - we got him loads of mickey mouse clubhouse stuff, as he's totally obsessed with that show! Anyway we managed to convince him that Mickey was not scary and now he won't be parted from it!!
So for now I'm chipper. Baby has to come out sometime, right? I may not be so chipper if I'm still sat here in a week's time, sans baby. Everyone send labour vibes.....
There's no signs anything's going to happen yet. Last night the baby was kicking me so hard and wriggling so frantically I thought something might be happening, but no cigar. I had a crap night's sleep though and really should be napping now to catch up. I have the odd cramp here and there, and frequent BHs, but.....that's it. I now have faint stretchmarks appearing under my belly button - escaped getting any with William, so I'm not too chuffed about that.
My face is massive. I appear to have stored fat for breastfeeding in two main places: my thighs, which are absolutely GINORMOUS and my face. I look like I'm storing nuts in my cheeks for winter, like a squirrel. Seriously!
My lovely husband went back to work today after a fantastic week and a half off! We did lots of lovely family things last week. It was so much fun to sit around in the morning, drinking tea, eating shortbread and watching the olympics whilst playing with William. It was William's 2nd birthday yesterday, which was fab except for a minor blip when he appeared to be scared of the mickey mouse cuddly toy we got him - we got him loads of mickey mouse clubhouse stuff, as he's totally obsessed with that show! Anyway we managed to convince him that Mickey was not scary and now he won't be parted from it!!
So for now I'm chipper. Baby has to come out sometime, right? I may not be so chipper if I'm still sat here in a week's time, sans baby. Everyone send labour vibes.....
Sunday, 24 August 2008
Why am I so crap at waiting?
So. 38 weeks, 4 days.
Why am I so crap at waiting? I'm so impatient. This is all because I had William at 37 weeks. All throughout this pregnancy I thought minicookie would be early. Once I reached that 37 wk mark this time around, I've been expecting things to happen any day.....which is silly. Most pregnant women wouldn't expect anything to happen for at least another week...........or beyond.
But I'm rubbish. And the waiting is driving me crazy. Every evening I have a whole host of uncomfortable stuff going on down there, including a lovely splitting sensstion on my pelvic floor, strong BH and shooting nerve pains down my legs. It always feels like labour is imminent.....but of course it never is. I've become obsessive about cervical mucus. Which is lovely. It reminds me strongly of the 7 months of TTC last year. I was obsessive about mucus then too.
Quite frankly, being this pregnant It's making me grouchy. I'm sick of getting up 3 or 4 times to wee every night especially.
I am so ready for this. So ready for labour, and so ready to meet my little minicookie. What if I go over my due date? I can't bear the thought. Will I be sat here in 2 wks at 40+4, in a thoroughly foul mood? Aarrrghhhhhhhhhh!
Do I have any other news? I do, but this is a moany, self-indulgent entry, so I'll have to write about that stuff anyother time. For now, there's a tub of Ben & Jerrys with my name on it.
Why am I so crap at waiting? I'm so impatient. This is all because I had William at 37 weeks. All throughout this pregnancy I thought minicookie would be early. Once I reached that 37 wk mark this time around, I've been expecting things to happen any day.....which is silly. Most pregnant women wouldn't expect anything to happen for at least another week...........or beyond.
But I'm rubbish. And the waiting is driving me crazy. Every evening I have a whole host of uncomfortable stuff going on down there, including a lovely splitting sensstion on my pelvic floor, strong BH and shooting nerve pains down my legs. It always feels like labour is imminent.....but of course it never is. I've become obsessive about cervical mucus. Which is lovely. It reminds me strongly of the 7 months of TTC last year. I was obsessive about mucus then too.
Quite frankly, being this pregnant It's making me grouchy. I'm sick of getting up 3 or 4 times to wee every night especially.
I am so ready for this. So ready for labour, and so ready to meet my little minicookie. What if I go over my due date? I can't bear the thought. Will I be sat here in 2 wks at 40+4, in a thoroughly foul mood? Aarrrghhhhhhhhhh!
Do I have any other news? I do, but this is a moany, self-indulgent entry, so I'll have to write about that stuff anyother time. For now, there's a tub of Ben & Jerrys with my name on it.
Wednesday, 20 August 2008
38 weeks!
Just a quickie..I have stuff to do!
So I'm 38 weeks pregnant!!!! For the first time EVER!! It feels like a big deal to me. I can't wait to get her out but at the same time, I know every day in there is beneficial to her....William LOOKED premature at 37 wks, even though he was officially classed as full term! It feels like I might make my due date but I'd really rather not as that's still 2 long weeks away - around 39 weeks would be perfect. I'm so excited about the thought of going into labour....and I'm so ready for it........every time I go to the loo I'm looking for some sign that things are happening. At the same time though I'm so nervous. I just want to do it and get it over with!
I'm weeing a zillion times a night (well ok, like 3 or 4 times.....), constantly shattered and have loads of weird pains down there BUT this week everything is so much easier cos Mike has the week off work....yippeeeee! We braved Canterbury on the bus this morning.....William loved it and pointed out buses, trees, parks, bridges.....it was great! I got fitted for a nursing bra and felt really guilty because I needed a 40E (jeez!) and I've been squeezing myself into a 36DD. AND I've been wearing underwiring.....ooops. The bra I'm wearing right now feels blissfully comfortable. :-)
It was impossible to browse the shops much with Sausage in tow so we made do with wondering round the beautiful cobbled streets and visited the hotel where we got married 4 years ago (which is unrecognisable now as it's so modern).
The big news this week is....William is now sleeping in a toddler bed!!! And he loves it. I had serious apprehensions about the whole thing, not surprisingly. I wanted him to get properly used to it before minicookie was born. I had visions of him getting out multiple times a night or falling out. Or worst of all, hating it so much he refused to sleep in it! But we made a massive deal about it, telling him that cots are for babies and how this is a 'big boy bed' - anything that makes him feel like a grown up is generally a winner. And it worked! He cuddled up to his favourite blue blanket under his igglepiggle duvet and went to sleep! I was gobsmacked and absolutely thrilled! What an easy transition. Just shows that he was obviously ready for it!
Right, better get on. Midwife appointment on Friday - be interesting to see if the baby's enagaged any more (she was 3/5ths 8 days ago) - so I'll update you then..........xxx
So I'm 38 weeks pregnant!!!! For the first time EVER!! It feels like a big deal to me. I can't wait to get her out but at the same time, I know every day in there is beneficial to her....William LOOKED premature at 37 wks, even though he was officially classed as full term! It feels like I might make my due date but I'd really rather not as that's still 2 long weeks away - around 39 weeks would be perfect. I'm so excited about the thought of going into labour....and I'm so ready for it........every time I go to the loo I'm looking for some sign that things are happening. At the same time though I'm so nervous. I just want to do it and get it over with!
I'm weeing a zillion times a night (well ok, like 3 or 4 times.....), constantly shattered and have loads of weird pains down there BUT this week everything is so much easier cos Mike has the week off work....yippeeeee! We braved Canterbury on the bus this morning.....William loved it and pointed out buses, trees, parks, bridges.....it was great! I got fitted for a nursing bra and felt really guilty because I needed a 40E (jeez!) and I've been squeezing myself into a 36DD. AND I've been wearing underwiring.....ooops. The bra I'm wearing right now feels blissfully comfortable. :-)
It was impossible to browse the shops much with Sausage in tow so we made do with wondering round the beautiful cobbled streets and visited the hotel where we got married 4 years ago (which is unrecognisable now as it's so modern).
The big news this week is....William is now sleeping in a toddler bed!!! And he loves it. I had serious apprehensions about the whole thing, not surprisingly. I wanted him to get properly used to it before minicookie was born. I had visions of him getting out multiple times a night or falling out. Or worst of all, hating it so much he refused to sleep in it! But we made a massive deal about it, telling him that cots are for babies and how this is a 'big boy bed' - anything that makes him feel like a grown up is generally a winner. And it worked! He cuddled up to his favourite blue blanket under his igglepiggle duvet and went to sleep! I was gobsmacked and absolutely thrilled! What an easy transition. Just shows that he was obviously ready for it!
Right, better get on. Midwife appointment on Friday - be interesting to see if the baby's enagaged any more (she was 3/5ths 8 days ago) - so I'll update you then..........xxx
Friday, 15 August 2008
Beyond tired
I thought I was in labour last night. I've had about 3 hours sleep. Considering how tired i was yesterday, I am a mess today.
I'd felt weird ever since 5.30pm-ish when the baby was kicking like crazy and I had loads of pressure in my bottom (WTF?!). I went to bed at 9pm cos I desperately needed a good night's sleep - I ended up in floods of tears on the phone to Beaky yesterday afternoon due to tiredness, hormones, etc.
But i couldn't get to sleep. I was having suck strong Braxton Hicks (that I never normally get when I'm lying down in bed) - I just couldn't nod off, even though I was desperate for sleep. I had such strong pressure in my bottom too. Mike was out drinking. After a while I gave up trying to sleep and went downstairs to watch a bit of TV. I knew I wasn't in labout but I thought maybe this was part of the warm up. I managed to get about an hour's sleep from 11pm-12ish before more tummy problems woke me up again, but couldn't get back to sleep after that til - wait for it - 3.30am!! I was down here watching Big Brother on my birthing ball at 2.30am!!
Today, the braxton hicks have completely calmed down. God knows what that all was last night. I'm a wreck today and as soon as William goes for his nap at 12 noon, so am I!
I'd felt weird ever since 5.30pm-ish when the baby was kicking like crazy and I had loads of pressure in my bottom (WTF?!). I went to bed at 9pm cos I desperately needed a good night's sleep - I ended up in floods of tears on the phone to Beaky yesterday afternoon due to tiredness, hormones, etc.
But i couldn't get to sleep. I was having suck strong Braxton Hicks (that I never normally get when I'm lying down in bed) - I just couldn't nod off, even though I was desperate for sleep. I had such strong pressure in my bottom too. Mike was out drinking. After a while I gave up trying to sleep and went downstairs to watch a bit of TV. I knew I wasn't in labout but I thought maybe this was part of the warm up. I managed to get about an hour's sleep from 11pm-12ish before more tummy problems woke me up again, but couldn't get back to sleep after that til - wait for it - 3.30am!! I was down here watching Big Brother on my birthing ball at 2.30am!!
Today, the braxton hicks have completely calmed down. God knows what that all was last night. I'm a wreck today and as soon as William goes for his nap at 12 noon, so am I!
Thursday, 14 August 2008
37 weeks, 1 day
So, I'm officially more pregnant than I was with William.
At 37 weeks, 1 day with William, I was in the throes of labour. *shudders at the memory*
The problem is, now I've hit this milestone, I keep on expecting things to happen at any minute. Which it might not for 3 weeks yet! Or even more (surely not though...........I was 3/5ths engaged at 34 weeks!!!) I need to keep busy to get my mind off everything..........
Feel quite grumpy today though actually and a tad hormonal. I'm so, so tired - I'm sleeping so badly because I just can't get comfortable in bed with my almighty bump, pelvic pain and leg cramps. I'm missing toddler groups, music classes etc with William that I used to do in Maidenhead - definitely going to start with those as soon as I can after the new baby's born. I feel like such a boring mummy - I can't do rough and tumble or crazy games with William like I used to. We've got quite a nice routine at the moment though - we stay in in the morning and play, then after his lunchtime nap (around 12 to 1.30 or 2) we go out for a couple of hours- which I never feel like doing but it's essential for both of ours sanity. We usually go down to the seafront, or to the park, or the library, or town. Or see my mum or dad if they're off work, obviously. Today it'll be the park, but what I really feel like doing is curling up in bed with a movie/book - the park is a 15 min walk away and it huuuuuuuurts getting there and back.
Also it now looks like it's going to rain! Aaaarrrghhhhhhhh!
I had a consultation at the hospital on Tuesday which was very demoralising. I was hoping to get the go ahead for a water birth at the Canterbury birth centre, which I visited last Saturday - it's wondeful - but sadly they strongly advised a hospital birth at Margate after all the complications with William (very long labour due his back-to-back position, drip to help contractions, cut twice, ventouse, third degree tear). I was seriously peeved on Tuesday-the idea of giving birth on the labour ward is just yuck. No birth ball. No waterbirth. Inevitable lack of midwifes to help me with breastfeeding etc. My experiences at Wexham Park have really put me off labour wards in hospitals, although I realise they may not be all the same. Anyway. I think I'll just do the majority of my labout at home, and go to Margate at the last possible minute! I could just discard the advice but I doubt the birth centre would be willing to take me on with 'HOSPITAL BIRTH ADVISED' written in my notes. The only other alternative is a homebirth but I've never been keen on that idea.
Ugh ugh UGH. Had enough of being pregnant now. I'm so big, I can't do bloody anything.
In non-baby/pregnancy/birth news, we met Bruv's new American girlfriend, Erin, on Tuesday! It was so lovely to see Bruv, and Erin is absolutely lovely. Not Bruv's usual type at all but they seem to really have a connection!
The door keeps on banging and it's really pissing me off. I'm grumpy. Time for lunch I think.
At 37 weeks, 1 day with William, I was in the throes of labour. *shudders at the memory*
The problem is, now I've hit this milestone, I keep on expecting things to happen at any minute. Which it might not for 3 weeks yet! Or even more (surely not though...........I was 3/5ths engaged at 34 weeks!!!) I need to keep busy to get my mind off everything..........
Feel quite grumpy today though actually and a tad hormonal. I'm so, so tired - I'm sleeping so badly because I just can't get comfortable in bed with my almighty bump, pelvic pain and leg cramps. I'm missing toddler groups, music classes etc with William that I used to do in Maidenhead - definitely going to start with those as soon as I can after the new baby's born. I feel like such a boring mummy - I can't do rough and tumble or crazy games with William like I used to. We've got quite a nice routine at the moment though - we stay in in the morning and play, then after his lunchtime nap (around 12 to 1.30 or 2) we go out for a couple of hours- which I never feel like doing but it's essential for both of ours sanity. We usually go down to the seafront, or to the park, or the library, or town. Or see my mum or dad if they're off work, obviously. Today it'll be the park, but what I really feel like doing is curling up in bed with a movie/book - the park is a 15 min walk away and it huuuuuuuurts getting there and back.
Also it now looks like it's going to rain! Aaaarrrghhhhhhhh!
I had a consultation at the hospital on Tuesday which was very demoralising. I was hoping to get the go ahead for a water birth at the Canterbury birth centre, which I visited last Saturday - it's wondeful - but sadly they strongly advised a hospital birth at Margate after all the complications with William (very long labour due his back-to-back position, drip to help contractions, cut twice, ventouse, third degree tear). I was seriously peeved on Tuesday-the idea of giving birth on the labour ward is just yuck. No birth ball. No waterbirth. Inevitable lack of midwifes to help me with breastfeeding etc. My experiences at Wexham Park have really put me off labour wards in hospitals, although I realise they may not be all the same. Anyway. I think I'll just do the majority of my labout at home, and go to Margate at the last possible minute! I could just discard the advice but I doubt the birth centre would be willing to take me on with 'HOSPITAL BIRTH ADVISED' written in my notes. The only other alternative is a homebirth but I've never been keen on that idea.
Ugh ugh UGH. Had enough of being pregnant now. I'm so big, I can't do bloody anything.
In non-baby/pregnancy/birth news, we met Bruv's new American girlfriend, Erin, on Tuesday! It was so lovely to see Bruv, and Erin is absolutely lovely. Not Bruv's usual type at all but they seem to really have a connection!
The door keeps on banging and it's really pissing me off. I'm grumpy. Time for lunch I think.
Thursday, 7 August 2008
Giving birth again.....
Hey hey! As I tip-tap-type, I'm listening to Ministry of Sound Anthems, 1991-2008 - a new purchase from Amazon that arrived literally 20 mins ago - and man, I'm all nostalgic! These songs remind me of going clubbing in dodgy clubs in Rugby when I was 16/17....and my Saturday job at Bacons, a pikey shoe shop.....and partying non-stop at Manchester University!! Ahhhhh.....
Anyway! That all seems like another lifetime, as I sit here heavily pregnant! The Big B day is looming closer.....and I swing from feeling really positive about it to heavy feelings of dread and quite frankly, terror! William's birth was so long and incredibly painful, ending with me being on a drip and having an episiostimy, ventouse delivery and a third degree tear! I feel so proud of the fact that I did it all naturally, but it was beyond all shadow of a doubt the most horrendous thing I'm ever experienced. I badly want things to be be different this time. It would be all too easy to opt for an epidural, but I'm stubborn and I just don't like the idea of not being in control - and I wouldn't be if everything was numb from the waist down!
This time the experience should be shorter - or so everyone has told me anyway. I'm hoping mini-cookie won't be back to back - she isn't at the moment and I'm spending most of my day walking, sitting forward, etc to keep her in the right position. So that's 2 plus points.
This is my birth 'plan' (does anything ever go according to plan...?). When labour begins, I'm going to stay here as long as possible, rocking on my birth ball (that was the one thing that really helped during William's labour) and sitting in the bath. When it's unbearable and contractions are close together, we'll head off to wherever I'll be giving birth (hopefully the Canterbury birth centre....I'll find out if I'm a suitable candidate next Tuesday) and then I'll have gas & air. Not keen on the idea of pethidine but I'd love to have a water birth, if the pool is free!
I just need to stay calm. When those contractions begin, I need to breathe through each one and not start tensing up with fear and panic, which will just make things worse. Yes, it will be bloody painful but it won't last forever. And I CAN do it. I CAN have a good birth experience! I'm sure of it. Banish the fear..........
I want to breastfeed the conventional way - not expressing like a lunatic for 6 months again. Canterbury birth centre is very supportive and you can stay there for 2/3 nights to get breastfeeding established, if you like!
As for beyond that....well. I'm expecting life to be absolute mayhem for a few weeks whilst we get used to life with 2 children! Again, I go from feeling really positive about it to really nervous. I hope William won't be too jealous. He loves my full attention, all the time. I honestly don't know how everything will pan out.....so I'm keeping an open mind. The one thing I'm sure of is that I'm going to keep William's routine exactly the same. That won't change. And I'm going to give him oodles of love and attention so he knows he's still my gorgeous little sausage. I'm fully expecting a spell of undesirable behaviour as he gets used to sharing me with a cute little newborn, but hopefully things will settle down eventually.
Speaking of William.........it suddenly feels like lots of grown-up things are happening at once. We stopped bottles a few weeks ago - he has milk in his IgglePiggle cup before naptimes and at bedtime now. He's sleeping brilliantly - a 2 hr nap in the day, and 10-11 hours at night, usually without waking! And (sob) we've ordered a toddler bed! He can put his foot over his cot and I'm terrified he's going to topple out. Not sure when we'll do the transition - am hoping the bed will arrive before new baby does, as we can't do it straight after, obviously.
Potty training is still a while off. That's one thing I'm in no rush to do at all!
So, I'm 36+1 now. The 37 week mark is looming ever closer. Next Wednesday! Will I go beyond that mark....unlike last time?! Will my waters break with a spectacular gush.....like last time?! I can't wait to find out! I'm ready for it now.......so BRING IT ON!!!!
Anyway! That all seems like another lifetime, as I sit here heavily pregnant! The Big B day is looming closer.....and I swing from feeling really positive about it to heavy feelings of dread and quite frankly, terror! William's birth was so long and incredibly painful, ending with me being on a drip and having an episiostimy, ventouse delivery and a third degree tear! I feel so proud of the fact that I did it all naturally, but it was beyond all shadow of a doubt the most horrendous thing I'm ever experienced. I badly want things to be be different this time. It would be all too easy to opt for an epidural, but I'm stubborn and I just don't like the idea of not being in control - and I wouldn't be if everything was numb from the waist down!
This time the experience should be shorter - or so everyone has told me anyway. I'm hoping mini-cookie won't be back to back - she isn't at the moment and I'm spending most of my day walking, sitting forward, etc to keep her in the right position. So that's 2 plus points.
This is my birth 'plan' (does anything ever go according to plan...?). When labour begins, I'm going to stay here as long as possible, rocking on my birth ball (that was the one thing that really helped during William's labour) and sitting in the bath. When it's unbearable and contractions are close together, we'll head off to wherever I'll be giving birth (hopefully the Canterbury birth centre....I'll find out if I'm a suitable candidate next Tuesday) and then I'll have gas & air. Not keen on the idea of pethidine but I'd love to have a water birth, if the pool is free!
I just need to stay calm. When those contractions begin, I need to breathe through each one and not start tensing up with fear and panic, which will just make things worse. Yes, it will be bloody painful but it won't last forever. And I CAN do it. I CAN have a good birth experience! I'm sure of it. Banish the fear..........
I want to breastfeed the conventional way - not expressing like a lunatic for 6 months again. Canterbury birth centre is very supportive and you can stay there for 2/3 nights to get breastfeeding established, if you like!
As for beyond that....well. I'm expecting life to be absolute mayhem for a few weeks whilst we get used to life with 2 children! Again, I go from feeling really positive about it to really nervous. I hope William won't be too jealous. He loves my full attention, all the time. I honestly don't know how everything will pan out.....so I'm keeping an open mind. The one thing I'm sure of is that I'm going to keep William's routine exactly the same. That won't change. And I'm going to give him oodles of love and attention so he knows he's still my gorgeous little sausage. I'm fully expecting a spell of undesirable behaviour as he gets used to sharing me with a cute little newborn, but hopefully things will settle down eventually.
Speaking of William.........it suddenly feels like lots of grown-up things are happening at once. We stopped bottles a few weeks ago - he has milk in his IgglePiggle cup before naptimes and at bedtime now. He's sleeping brilliantly - a 2 hr nap in the day, and 10-11 hours at night, usually without waking! And (sob) we've ordered a toddler bed! He can put his foot over his cot and I'm terrified he's going to topple out. Not sure when we'll do the transition - am hoping the bed will arrive before new baby does, as we can't do it straight after, obviously.
Potty training is still a while off. That's one thing I'm in no rush to do at all!
So, I'm 36+1 now. The 37 week mark is looming ever closer. Next Wednesday! Will I go beyond that mark....unlike last time?! Will my waters break with a spectacular gush.....like last time?! I can't wait to find out! I'm ready for it now.......so BRING IT ON!!!!
Monday, 4 August 2008
Nearly 36 weeks.....
Yo Yo,
It's a quiet and peaceful Monday morning in Herne Bay! William's having an early nap as he woke himself up at 5am, doing a spectacular poo - and he didn't even go to sleep til 8pm last night, the little monkey. Hoping he has a really loooooooong nap - 2 hours would be nice!
Weekend was fab - we finished 'nesting' for the baby in Mothercare; we have EVERYTHING we need now! The crib's even constructed! We took William to the park, and soft play - the stuff I can't really do with him in the week - and yesterday afternoon was Herne Bay bus rally (!!) so we all went on an open top bus tour along the seafront! William loved it!
Also on Saturday night my mum & dad babysat and Mike and I went for dinner for the first time in a YEAR! We went to this gorgeous Thai place and sat outside, munching on spring rolls, pad thai, and chatted and chatted til it was dusk! It was lovely and just what we needed before the new baby arrives.
Speaking of which..........I'm 35+5 now. The baby is three fifths engaged already - which doesn't surprise me, as my bump has dropped and I have a 'splitting' feeling when I walk. It's really uncomfortable and feels like the baby is going to fall out! Bleugh. I'm absolutely HUGE and it's hard to sleep, walk far, or do anything really - I can't bear the thought of being like this for another 4 wks! But I have no idea when I'm going to have this baby. Because I gave birth at 37 weeks last time, it would be good to go a little later than that this time - around 38 wks would be perfect!!
Oh man, William's woken....will continue this later......
It's a quiet and peaceful Monday morning in Herne Bay! William's having an early nap as he woke himself up at 5am, doing a spectacular poo - and he didn't even go to sleep til 8pm last night, the little monkey. Hoping he has a really loooooooong nap - 2 hours would be nice!
Weekend was fab - we finished 'nesting' for the baby in Mothercare; we have EVERYTHING we need now! The crib's even constructed! We took William to the park, and soft play - the stuff I can't really do with him in the week - and yesterday afternoon was Herne Bay bus rally (!!) so we all went on an open top bus tour along the seafront! William loved it!
Also on Saturday night my mum & dad babysat and Mike and I went for dinner for the first time in a YEAR! We went to this gorgeous Thai place and sat outside, munching on spring rolls, pad thai, and chatted and chatted til it was dusk! It was lovely and just what we needed before the new baby arrives.
Speaking of which..........I'm 35+5 now. The baby is three fifths engaged already - which doesn't surprise me, as my bump has dropped and I have a 'splitting' feeling when I walk. It's really uncomfortable and feels like the baby is going to fall out! Bleugh. I'm absolutely HUGE and it's hard to sleep, walk far, or do anything really - I can't bear the thought of being like this for another 4 wks! But I have no idea when I'm going to have this baby. Because I gave birth at 37 weeks last time, it would be good to go a little later than that this time - around 38 wks would be perfect!!
Oh man, William's woken....will continue this later......
Wednesday, 23 July 2008
Big update!
Well! I've been away from here for AGES!! Before we moved down here to Herne Bay I never seemed to have a moment to write on here, and then after we moved we lost our internet connection for a while, but now....here I am!!! So much hass happened. Let's whizzzzzzz through.....
HOUSE
So we now live in Herne Bay! Our house is just beautiful. I love it so much. The rooms are big and there's so much space! We have our 'adult' lounge which is lovely to chill out in after William goes to bed, and William has his own little lounge (complete with TV!), playroom and patio! I feel so content here. At Powney Road in Maidenhead I felt like a caged bird - it was so small and claustrophobic....especially when I was childminding.
Our location is fab too! It's a short stroll to town, the park, soft play, the park, and best of all, the beach!! The sea is so close, it's crazy - literally 5 mins walk. I'm finding it hard and painful getting anywhere much at the moment, but when the baby's born, I'll be able to explore the area loads more!
The weather has been so lush since we moved here, so William and I have been to the beach loads! It's blissful just sitting and gazing at the sea, blue sky, fluffy clouds, boats on the horizon, Reculver Castle in the distance, while William collects stones/builds sandcastles. He loves the seaside. It's such a great, and healthy, place to bring up kids.
My mum & dad are just round the corner, so we spend most weekends with them and I also see my mum a couple of times in the week. Which is nice as I left all my mummy mates behind in Maidenhead (sob). I am going to start going to toddler groups etc but most shut down in the summer hols, so I'll probably start in September when the baby's born.
So overall, Herne Bay rocks. We're much happier here and Maidenhead seems a distant memory!
WILLIAM
Adjusted very well to the move! He has actually started SLEEPING THROUGH and no longer wakes asking for milk etc.! Is it the sea air? His new nursery? I don't know, but it's bloody brilliant! He can actually settle himself when he wakes at night now. It only took 2 long years of crap nights! He now has his bedtime milk in a cup, and although I offer him milk before his daytime nap, he doesn't really take it. I also no longer use the breathing sensor! New baby will need it.
He's waking very eary every day - usually around 5.30am - but I can't really complain since he goes down at 7pm.
He blows me away every day with what he can do and say. His speech is amazing - he can count to 14 and knows all of his letters and colours. He's talking in toddler-style sentences and knows an insane amount of words - I couldn't even try to count them. His favourite thing at the moment is jigsaws, and he can do his Peppa Pig, Teletubbies and In the Night Garden puzzles pretty much independently (all intended for kids aged 3+!!!!). I know every mum is biased but William is a real bright spark! He loves books, drawing, playdo, Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, and eating everything in sight - I'm really lucky not to have a fussy toddler!
On the downside, he's still very clingy and says 'mama! mama!' on loop throughout the day, repeatedly, until I want to boil my own head. Yesterday afternoon was particularly bad as I was trying to talk to my mum and he couldn't stand not being the centre of attention. He has to be in the same room as me and even comes to the loo with me every time I go! Yep, he's that clingy. With clinginess also comes temper tantrums. He goes through phases of extreme feistiness, which I'm sure must be v common in nearly-2s. But it's hard to stay patient when he's screaming because I didn't let him go down the stairs first, or a baked bean dropped on the floor. *sigh* I love him so much, but just a little more independence would be nice - especially with a new baby on the way. Speaking of which...........
PREGNANCY
I'm 34 wks pregnant today, and absolutely huge. Seriously! My pelvic pain is very bad, my back aches constantly, I have to go to the loo every 10 mins (approx.), and I have bouts of nausea and IBS throughout the day. FUN! Not to mention the mad mood swings. Anyway. My friend Deirdre had a little girl this morning, which was a real shock as she was 100% convinced it was a boy! For some reason this had made me freak out and panic that the scanner somehow got it wrong and I won't get my longed-for daughter. Silly, yes? That's hormones for you. Baby still moving loads, although less as she runs out of room. We haven't bought anything yet, and I'm getting the urge to nest, so we're going to get the crib etc this weekend. I'm hoping to have the baby a little early, maybe around 38 wks (are you listening to my request, little lady??) as I'm just so uncomfortable now.
Well, that's your lot for now. Off to library etc this afternoon and to meet my mum for coffee. Yay! xxxx
HOUSE
So we now live in Herne Bay! Our house is just beautiful. I love it so much. The rooms are big and there's so much space! We have our 'adult' lounge which is lovely to chill out in after William goes to bed, and William has his own little lounge (complete with TV!), playroom and patio! I feel so content here. At Powney Road in Maidenhead I felt like a caged bird - it was so small and claustrophobic....especially when I was childminding.
Our location is fab too! It's a short stroll to town, the park, soft play, the park, and best of all, the beach!! The sea is so close, it's crazy - literally 5 mins walk. I'm finding it hard and painful getting anywhere much at the moment, but when the baby's born, I'll be able to explore the area loads more!
The weather has been so lush since we moved here, so William and I have been to the beach loads! It's blissful just sitting and gazing at the sea, blue sky, fluffy clouds, boats on the horizon, Reculver Castle in the distance, while William collects stones/builds sandcastles. He loves the seaside. It's such a great, and healthy, place to bring up kids.
My mum & dad are just round the corner, so we spend most weekends with them and I also see my mum a couple of times in the week. Which is nice as I left all my mummy mates behind in Maidenhead (sob). I am going to start going to toddler groups etc but most shut down in the summer hols, so I'll probably start in September when the baby's born.
So overall, Herne Bay rocks. We're much happier here and Maidenhead seems a distant memory!
WILLIAM
Adjusted very well to the move! He has actually started SLEEPING THROUGH and no longer wakes asking for milk etc.! Is it the sea air? His new nursery? I don't know, but it's bloody brilliant! He can actually settle himself when he wakes at night now. It only took 2 long years of crap nights! He now has his bedtime milk in a cup, and although I offer him milk before his daytime nap, he doesn't really take it. I also no longer use the breathing sensor! New baby will need it.
He's waking very eary every day - usually around 5.30am - but I can't really complain since he goes down at 7pm.
He blows me away every day with what he can do and say. His speech is amazing - he can count to 14 and knows all of his letters and colours. He's talking in toddler-style sentences and knows an insane amount of words - I couldn't even try to count them. His favourite thing at the moment is jigsaws, and he can do his Peppa Pig, Teletubbies and In the Night Garden puzzles pretty much independently (all intended for kids aged 3+!!!!). I know every mum is biased but William is a real bright spark! He loves books, drawing, playdo, Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, and eating everything in sight - I'm really lucky not to have a fussy toddler!
On the downside, he's still very clingy and says 'mama! mama!' on loop throughout the day, repeatedly, until I want to boil my own head. Yesterday afternoon was particularly bad as I was trying to talk to my mum and he couldn't stand not being the centre of attention. He has to be in the same room as me and even comes to the loo with me every time I go! Yep, he's that clingy. With clinginess also comes temper tantrums. He goes through phases of extreme feistiness, which I'm sure must be v common in nearly-2s. But it's hard to stay patient when he's screaming because I didn't let him go down the stairs first, or a baked bean dropped on the floor. *sigh* I love him so much, but just a little more independence would be nice - especially with a new baby on the way. Speaking of which...........
PREGNANCY
I'm 34 wks pregnant today, and absolutely huge. Seriously! My pelvic pain is very bad, my back aches constantly, I have to go to the loo every 10 mins (approx.), and I have bouts of nausea and IBS throughout the day. FUN! Not to mention the mad mood swings. Anyway. My friend Deirdre had a little girl this morning, which was a real shock as she was 100% convinced it was a boy! For some reason this had made me freak out and panic that the scanner somehow got it wrong and I won't get my longed-for daughter. Silly, yes? That's hormones for you. Baby still moving loads, although less as she runs out of room. We haven't bought anything yet, and I'm getting the urge to nest, so we're going to get the crib etc this weekend. I'm hoping to have the baby a little early, maybe around 38 wks (are you listening to my request, little lady??) as I'm just so uncomfortable now.
Well, that's your lot for now. Off to library etc this afternoon and to meet my mum for coffee. Yay! xxxx
Saturday, 31 May 2008
Big update
Heyhey! Its Saturday morning and I'm fighting the urge to nap while William does. Zzzzzz. Not sure why I'm so tired as William's sleep has been fine recently. Ah well. Here's all the news.......
1) House. WE FOUND A HOUSE!!!! Last weekend we had a looooong wkend in Herne Bay with my parents, with multiple house viewings. We saw some really lovely places - all soooo much bigger than anything we could afford here. But there was one house I totally fell in love with the minute I stepped inside it! Unexpectedlly, it's in Herne Bay, where my parents live......we really wanted to live in Whitstable as it's a bit hipper and so lovely - but Herne Bay is lovely too!
So, the house.....it's £950 per month and is MASSIVE. I'm talking huge here. Front and back garden, big entrance hall, massive kitchen, big conservatory/playroom leading to the garden, dining room, lounge and 4 bedrooms. FOUR!!! And it's a house with character - built in 1903, with fireplaces and everything. I hate faceless modern builds.
As we were walking round, I was getting more & more excited. I could totally see me and the kids here, in the playroom, going out to the garden in the summer........having friends round for a BBQ......it just felt so right. And the street is lovely too - big wide pavements, residential-y.
And the landlord! What a sweet man. He said he'd be happy to put a fridge/freezer, washing machine and a dishwasher in!!!! Best of all, it's 10-15 mins walk from the beach, park,town, leisure centre AND a soft play area!!
So after seeing this house, my judgement was clouded. Every other house we saw was far inferior. To me anyway. The only slight problems with this house were: a) it's not Whitstable and b) it's a long walk to the station. And Mike will still be commuting to London every day for work, and we don't have a car. But he's going to bike it! So I think it will work out fine. It will be slightly bizarre being in the same town in my parents - we weren't expecting that! But we're looking forward to having the option of babysitters occasionally so we can get some coupley time. The last time we went out to dinner was August last year. I kid you not. And the cinema? Before we even moved to Maidenhead - probably 2005!!
They're doing our credit checks at the mo - but after that, we should get the go ahead and the house will be OURS!!! I'm so so excited-our moving date is 4 weeks TODAY!!! I think I'm going to be really really happy there. :-)
2) Eating. I'm eating so much junk at the mo. I'm becoming much more aware of what crap is in most foods - mostly because I always scruitinise the ingredients of everything William eats. Never bothered me before but as I approach 30 (eeeeek!!) I want to subtley make a shift towards a more healthy lifestyle. Don't most people do that when they reach 30?? I worry about the junk I consume - so when we move, I want to make a big conscience effort to get more organic, home-grown fruit & veg - which will be easy, as they have lots of farmer's markets down there.
3) Childminding. Still sucks. I have just 2 more weeks left with Rebecca, and 4 with Louis. Yipppeeeee! Stupid OFSTED want to come and expect me though, which is completely nonsensical seeing as a) we're just about to move and b) I'm going to have at least a year off from it when the baby is born. Trying to think of ways to get out of it at the moment.
4) William. Is still my happy little boy. He's amazing me at the moment with how much he knows. He knows his numbers up to 12, all his colours, and most of the letters in the alphabet!!!!
His sleep is better, although he's being a little fussy with some of his foods - refusing to eat stuff that he's always loved, which is bizarre. He's still very demanding of my attention and likes to be watched all day, every day. Which can get a little wearying. If I'm not watching him, he says my name until I do! I'm sure he'll get more independent as he gets older. I think he's super bright, but I'm a little biased!
5) Pregnancy. And sexiness. I feel about as sexy as a sack of spuds right now. Big bump, big veiny boobs, big ass, greying maternity bras, big granny knickers. Hello boys! Not surprising seeing as I'm 26 weeks pregnant I guess. Been thinking recently though about sexing myself up again when this baby is born. Well, when I finish breastfeeding probably. I'm going to lose all the weight from both pregnancies, get some sexy underwear and nice clothes, sort out my old & decaying makeup, and make my hair half presentable at least. Until then, it's slob city!
Right, Mike wants the internet so I'd better go. Laters my lovelies xxxxxxxxxxxx
1) House. WE FOUND A HOUSE!!!! Last weekend we had a looooong wkend in Herne Bay with my parents, with multiple house viewings. We saw some really lovely places - all soooo much bigger than anything we could afford here. But there was one house I totally fell in love with the minute I stepped inside it! Unexpectedlly, it's in Herne Bay, where my parents live......we really wanted to live in Whitstable as it's a bit hipper and so lovely - but Herne Bay is lovely too!
So, the house.....it's £950 per month and is MASSIVE. I'm talking huge here. Front and back garden, big entrance hall, massive kitchen, big conservatory/playroom leading to the garden, dining room, lounge and 4 bedrooms. FOUR!!! And it's a house with character - built in 1903, with fireplaces and everything. I hate faceless modern builds.
As we were walking round, I was getting more & more excited. I could totally see me and the kids here, in the playroom, going out to the garden in the summer........having friends round for a BBQ......it just felt so right. And the street is lovely too - big wide pavements, residential-y.
And the landlord! What a sweet man. He said he'd be happy to put a fridge/freezer, washing machine and a dishwasher in!!!! Best of all, it's 10-15 mins walk from the beach, park,town, leisure centre AND a soft play area!!
So after seeing this house, my judgement was clouded. Every other house we saw was far inferior. To me anyway. The only slight problems with this house were: a) it's not Whitstable and b) it's a long walk to the station. And Mike will still be commuting to London every day for work, and we don't have a car. But he's going to bike it! So I think it will work out fine. It will be slightly bizarre being in the same town in my parents - we weren't expecting that! But we're looking forward to having the option of babysitters occasionally so we can get some coupley time. The last time we went out to dinner was August last year. I kid you not. And the cinema? Before we even moved to Maidenhead - probably 2005!!
They're doing our credit checks at the mo - but after that, we should get the go ahead and the house will be OURS!!! I'm so so excited-our moving date is 4 weeks TODAY!!! I think I'm going to be really really happy there. :-)
2) Eating. I'm eating so much junk at the mo. I'm becoming much more aware of what crap is in most foods - mostly because I always scruitinise the ingredients of everything William eats. Never bothered me before but as I approach 30 (eeeeek!!) I want to subtley make a shift towards a more healthy lifestyle. Don't most people do that when they reach 30?? I worry about the junk I consume - so when we move, I want to make a big conscience effort to get more organic, home-grown fruit & veg - which will be easy, as they have lots of farmer's markets down there.
3) Childminding. Still sucks. I have just 2 more weeks left with Rebecca, and 4 with Louis. Yipppeeeee! Stupid OFSTED want to come and expect me though, which is completely nonsensical seeing as a) we're just about to move and b) I'm going to have at least a year off from it when the baby is born. Trying to think of ways to get out of it at the moment.
4) William. Is still my happy little boy. He's amazing me at the moment with how much he knows. He knows his numbers up to 12, all his colours, and most of the letters in the alphabet!!!!
His sleep is better, although he's being a little fussy with some of his foods - refusing to eat stuff that he's always loved, which is bizarre. He's still very demanding of my attention and likes to be watched all day, every day. Which can get a little wearying. If I'm not watching him, he says my name until I do! I'm sure he'll get more independent as he gets older. I think he's super bright, but I'm a little biased!
5) Pregnancy. And sexiness. I feel about as sexy as a sack of spuds right now. Big bump, big veiny boobs, big ass, greying maternity bras, big granny knickers. Hello boys! Not surprising seeing as I'm 26 weeks pregnant I guess. Been thinking recently though about sexing myself up again when this baby is born. Well, when I finish breastfeeding probably. I'm going to lose all the weight from both pregnancies, get some sexy underwear and nice clothes, sort out my old & decaying makeup, and make my hair half presentable at least. Until then, it's slob city!
Right, Mike wants the internet so I'd better go. Laters my lovelies xxxxxxxxxxxx
Monday, 19 May 2008
Typing at the speed of light......
........cos although both kids are asleep, I know one of them at least is going to wake up in a mo, and really i should be doing stuff like prepping dinner blah be blah....
No Louis today cos he's on holiday. Yay! Much easier with just 2.
We had a really, really lovely family weekend! On Saturday lunchtime after William's nap we caught the bus into town and all had lunch at noodlebar - man, I'm going to miss that place when we move, and so will William I suspect! We then whizzed off to the library - one of William's very favourite places! - where he read lots of books with daddy and we got some more out for him. Daddy then took him to cheeky charlies soft play while I did some quick food shopping! Phew! It was a lovely, busy afternoon and William had a blast!
Yesterday after William's nap we headed off to the annual Maidenhead Duck Derby!!!!! It was so much fun although poor Sausage had a bit of a cold and was a bit grumpy. We had an ice-cream, William and I rode the train round Ray Mill Island (he LOVED that), we had a few gos on the stalls, and watched punch and judy. It was great! After a walk along the river we headed home - William was getting REALLY grumpy by then. After my favourite dinner of fajhitas we watched Into the Wild - man, what a film. I couldn't stop thinking about it when I went to bed. Still can't, actually. I'm really fussy about films, and rarely watch them, but this one........it was brilliant!
William was very restless during the night as his nose is so stuffed up. Not much I can do except put Vicks on his chest and olbas oil in the cot. Still, he's been happy as ever this morning so I don't think (touch wood) he's ill really! After months of ignoring the vast majority of his toys, he's actually playing with them again! We had them all out this morning. He especially loves his newish alphabet & number puzzles!
Gotta tutor this evening which means racing to get William to bed by 7pm......tricky these days, especially as he naps later. Hurumph. Think we'll head off to the park for a good run around when he wakes up; should wear him out a bit.
Something feels wrong down there. It's either thrush or cystitis........or maybe both. Yuck. I think I'm going to have tro go and get it checked out at the docs.....cringe. Wish they weren't all bloody male docs.
Right, I'm going to try and do a couple of jobs before the kiddywinks wake up. Adios amigos....xxxx
No Louis today cos he's on holiday. Yay! Much easier with just 2.
We had a really, really lovely family weekend! On Saturday lunchtime after William's nap we caught the bus into town and all had lunch at noodlebar - man, I'm going to miss that place when we move, and so will William I suspect! We then whizzed off to the library - one of William's very favourite places! - where he read lots of books with daddy and we got some more out for him. Daddy then took him to cheeky charlies soft play while I did some quick food shopping! Phew! It was a lovely, busy afternoon and William had a blast!
Yesterday after William's nap we headed off to the annual Maidenhead Duck Derby!!!!! It was so much fun although poor Sausage had a bit of a cold and was a bit grumpy. We had an ice-cream, William and I rode the train round Ray Mill Island (he LOVED that), we had a few gos on the stalls, and watched punch and judy. It was great! After a walk along the river we headed home - William was getting REALLY grumpy by then. After my favourite dinner of fajhitas we watched Into the Wild - man, what a film. I couldn't stop thinking about it when I went to bed. Still can't, actually. I'm really fussy about films, and rarely watch them, but this one........it was brilliant!
William was very restless during the night as his nose is so stuffed up. Not much I can do except put Vicks on his chest and olbas oil in the cot. Still, he's been happy as ever this morning so I don't think (touch wood) he's ill really! After months of ignoring the vast majority of his toys, he's actually playing with them again! We had them all out this morning. He especially loves his newish alphabet & number puzzles!
Gotta tutor this evening which means racing to get William to bed by 7pm......tricky these days, especially as he naps later. Hurumph. Think we'll head off to the park for a good run around when he wakes up; should wear him out a bit.
Something feels wrong down there. It's either thrush or cystitis........or maybe both. Yuck. I think I'm going to have tro go and get it checked out at the docs.....cringe. Wish they weren't all bloody male docs.
Right, I'm going to try and do a couple of jobs before the kiddywinks wake up. Adios amigos....xxxx
Friday, 16 May 2008
Chipper!
Friday afternoon! Peace has descended on the house as both boys are napping. I could easily nap myself right now - not sure why as I slept pretty well last night due to William.........(drum roll please) SLEEPING THROUGH!!! I think this might actually be the first time EVER that he's done this. No waking for milk, water, or anything. He slept soundly from 7.30pm to 6am!! Helps that it's cooler now and there was no need for the noisy fan in his room. I'm not holding my breath - almost certainly it's a one-off, but YAY, all the same!
This week:
1) Everyone now knows we're moving to Kent. I told Louisa,. Louis's mum (who wailed about this being her 'worst nightmare' - Jeez, thanks for the guilt trip) and Deirdre, Julia and the rest of the girls (who were sad but completely understood).
2) Rebecca's mum has told me she wants Rebecca to finish with me on the 15th June!! This is great as it's only 4 more weeks; it's not so great as I'll miss out on 2 weeks pay. But Mike thinks that will be ok & we'll manage.
3) Our new move date is 28/29th June. NEXT MONTH!!! We're going down to Whitstable next Friday to find a property hopefully..........*crosses fingers*
I'm so, SO excited about our move! I've got a permanent pre-holiday-excited feeling. It feels like the beginning of a new era......life will be so different and (I hope) wonderful! I can't wait to live by the sea. And no more yucky childminding for at least a year!! I feel nervous about having no income but according to Mike I'm entitled to maternity allowance as I've been self-employed, which is about £450 per month - plus we're saving like crazy. Gotta sort all the money stuff out this weekend to make sure we're ok.
And this weekend, blissfully, we haven't got to go anywhere - a nice chilled out family weekend. Yay!
Right, better skiddadle. Laters peeps xxxxxxxxxx
This week:
1) Everyone now knows we're moving to Kent. I told Louisa,. Louis's mum (who wailed about this being her 'worst nightmare' - Jeez, thanks for the guilt trip) and Deirdre, Julia and the rest of the girls (who were sad but completely understood).
2) Rebecca's mum has told me she wants Rebecca to finish with me on the 15th June!! This is great as it's only 4 more weeks; it's not so great as I'll miss out on 2 weeks pay. But Mike thinks that will be ok & we'll manage.
3) Our new move date is 28/29th June. NEXT MONTH!!! We're going down to Whitstable next Friday to find a property hopefully..........*crosses fingers*
I'm so, SO excited about our move! I've got a permanent pre-holiday-excited feeling. It feels like the beginning of a new era......life will be so different and (I hope) wonderful! I can't wait to live by the sea. And no more yucky childminding for at least a year!! I feel nervous about having no income but according to Mike I'm entitled to maternity allowance as I've been self-employed, which is about £450 per month - plus we're saving like crazy. Gotta sort all the money stuff out this weekend to make sure we're ok.
And this weekend, blissfully, we haven't got to go anywhere - a nice chilled out family weekend. Yay!
Right, better skiddadle. Laters peeps xxxxxxxxxx
Wednesday, 14 May 2008
Dear Sausage
A little letter to celebrate your cuteness!
So, here we are at 20 months, and 2 days. You'll be 2 in 4 months - EEK! How did that happen?! I've loved watching you grow up little man. But this is my very favourite stage, right now. You've been through clingy stages, whingey stages, refusing-to-be-held-or-even-around-anyone-who-isn't-mummy/daddy-stages (man, THAT was stressful.....) but right now you are just so HAPPY! Everyone who meets who comments the same. You wake up full of beans and excitement (usually by calling 'mumma! mummmmmmaaaaaaaa'!') and pulling at your sleeping bag to get it off. That continues throughout the day! You laugh loads (sometimes manically - it's so funny!) and have never-ending energy, running about the house! It can get exhuasting but I'm so, SO glad you're like that and not all placid and boring! You love life!
Your vocabulary is HUGE. I can't list here all the things you can say; it's just so much! You can repeat most words you hear and are starting to put sentences together: 'night night mumma' (that melts my heart....). You know all the colours, numbers to 10, and lots of letters. You're a real bright spark.
Your favourite things to do are: reading, going to soft play, the park (especially the 'fimbs' (swings), the beach down at Beaky and Rav's, drawing, helping mummy with jobs around the house (turning on the washing machine etc), running around in people's gardens......you do play with your toys a bit but usually there are far more interesting things to do!
Your sleep is erratic, to say the least......always has been! You're still waking, and having some milk, in the night - but I don't mind too much, as long as it's only once or twice. You have 1 nap in the day, usually after lunch at 12.30-1pm, for anything from 1.5 hours to 2.5 hours.
Your hair is crazy at the moment - all crazy curls! I can't bear to cut it. You absolutely love it when we're all together as a family, pointing to us and saying 'mumma! Daddy!'. You ADORE your daddy and get so excited when he comes home.
I love you so much Sausage. I'm so glad I've been at home with you since you've been born. I can't bear to miss out on a second of your growing up. Soon you're going to have a little sibling, but you'll always be my very special firstborn........
all my love, Mumma xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
So, here we are at 20 months, and 2 days. You'll be 2 in 4 months - EEK! How did that happen?! I've loved watching you grow up little man. But this is my very favourite stage, right now. You've been through clingy stages, whingey stages, refusing-to-be-held-or-even-around-anyone-who-isn't-mummy/daddy-stages (man, THAT was stressful.....) but right now you are just so HAPPY! Everyone who meets who comments the same. You wake up full of beans and excitement (usually by calling 'mumma! mummmmmmaaaaaaaa'!') and pulling at your sleeping bag to get it off. That continues throughout the day! You laugh loads (sometimes manically - it's so funny!) and have never-ending energy, running about the house! It can get exhuasting but I'm so, SO glad you're like that and not all placid and boring! You love life!
Your vocabulary is HUGE. I can't list here all the things you can say; it's just so much! You can repeat most words you hear and are starting to put sentences together: 'night night mumma' (that melts my heart....). You know all the colours, numbers to 10, and lots of letters. You're a real bright spark.
Your favourite things to do are: reading, going to soft play, the park (especially the 'fimbs' (swings), the beach down at Beaky and Rav's, drawing, helping mummy with jobs around the house (turning on the washing machine etc), running around in people's gardens......you do play with your toys a bit but usually there are far more interesting things to do!
Your sleep is erratic, to say the least......always has been! You're still waking, and having some milk, in the night - but I don't mind too much, as long as it's only once or twice. You have 1 nap in the day, usually after lunch at 12.30-1pm, for anything from 1.5 hours to 2.5 hours.
Your hair is crazy at the moment - all crazy curls! I can't bear to cut it. You absolutely love it when we're all together as a family, pointing to us and saying 'mumma! Daddy!'. You ADORE your daddy and get so excited when he comes home.
I love you so much Sausage. I'm so glad I've been at home with you since you've been born. I can't bear to miss out on a second of your growing up. Soon you're going to have a little sibling, but you'll always be my very special firstborn........
all my love, Mumma xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Thursday, 8 May 2008
GLORIOUS sunshine!
Oh My God, I love, love, LOVE this weather!!!! It's so wonderfully hot and sunny, with blue skies and a lovely summer breeze............it just makes me so happy!!! I'm definitely a summer girl. It's no wonder us English are such miserable people - we have such a long winter. But this makes up for it!!
This week, despite Mike not being here, has been lovely - mostly because of the weather! On Tuesday afternoon I took Rebecca and William to the park in the sunshine - we had a blast and Sausage kept on trying on my shades - he looked sooooooooooooo cute!
Yesterday morning we dashed off into town at 9am for my midwife appt. at 9.30. All ok there - despite me thinking I'm massive I'm measuring spot on for my dates (23 wks now!!!). Heard heartbeat which was reassuring as always. Then we went to the library which William always loves - he's such a bookworm! - and to buy him new shoes, which took forever as he has a high instep and loads weren't fitting properly.
And yesterday afternoon I FINALLY told Rebecca's mum that a) I'm pregnant b) we're moving to Kent and c) that June will be my last month with Rebecca! And it was FINE! Why was I worried?! She was made redundant on Tuesday so things would have changed anyway.
This morning we went to playgroup again in the sunshine - William was a bit grouchy but cheered up when he did some painting (on an easel like a grown up!) and played in some bubbly water. He loves being outside. And now both babies are napping and Julia's coming over in an hour or so - we're taking the kids to the park.
So I feel all sunny & content. I suppose the only thing bothering me is our forthcoming trip to Plymouth on Saturday, for many reasons. I'm dreading seeing all of Joyce's stuff, I really don't want to visit the open casket but don't want to offend Mike by not doing so, there's the funeral on Monday............*sigh*. Not to mention the loooooong car journey with William. I just need to be there for my husband I guess.
I need to do a William entry, all about him and his little ways soon. He's been sleeping better this week. He tends to wake around 10-11pm and I usually give him a milk top-up, but if he wakes again in the night I only give him water now - he was drinking stupid amounts of milk in the night. He usually wakes at least once more but I can generally settle him quickly. His nursery, as the hottest room in the house, is like a furnace in this weather - temp was 27 degrees last night! The fan doesn't really help- just blows the hot air about!
Right- better get on. Toodleoo for now.............xxxx
This week, despite Mike not being here, has been lovely - mostly because of the weather! On Tuesday afternoon I took Rebecca and William to the park in the sunshine - we had a blast and Sausage kept on trying on my shades - he looked sooooooooooooo cute!
Yesterday morning we dashed off into town at 9am for my midwife appt. at 9.30. All ok there - despite me thinking I'm massive I'm measuring spot on for my dates (23 wks now!!!). Heard heartbeat which was reassuring as always. Then we went to the library which William always loves - he's such a bookworm! - and to buy him new shoes, which took forever as he has a high instep and loads weren't fitting properly.
And yesterday afternoon I FINALLY told Rebecca's mum that a) I'm pregnant b) we're moving to Kent and c) that June will be my last month with Rebecca! And it was FINE! Why was I worried?! She was made redundant on Tuesday so things would have changed anyway.
This morning we went to playgroup again in the sunshine - William was a bit grouchy but cheered up when he did some painting (on an easel like a grown up!) and played in some bubbly water. He loves being outside. And now both babies are napping and Julia's coming over in an hour or so - we're taking the kids to the park.
So I feel all sunny & content. I suppose the only thing bothering me is our forthcoming trip to Plymouth on Saturday, for many reasons. I'm dreading seeing all of Joyce's stuff, I really don't want to visit the open casket but don't want to offend Mike by not doing so, there's the funeral on Monday............*sigh*. Not to mention the loooooong car journey with William. I just need to be there for my husband I guess.
I need to do a William entry, all about him and his little ways soon. He's been sleeping better this week. He tends to wake around 10-11pm and I usually give him a milk top-up, but if he wakes again in the night I only give him water now - he was drinking stupid amounts of milk in the night. He usually wakes at least once more but I can generally settle him quickly. His nursery, as the hottest room in the house, is like a furnace in this weather - temp was 27 degrees last night! The fan doesn't really help- just blows the hot air about!
Right- better get on. Toodleoo for now.............xxxx
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