Luurverly weekend!

Fab weekend, as always :-)
Friday was just such a lovely day. I LOVE it when Mike's here - it can be a little lonely being a SAHM and everything is just so much more relaaaaaaaxed when he's here!! After the scan (and the news! Jeez - still can't believe it's true - I daren't believe it might!!) we had a really chilled afternoon. I tutored and he took William to the park. Then in the evening I WENT OUT!!! Haven't been out for aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaages. I went to a swank Thai with all my Maidenhead mummy mates - Deirdre, Julia, Angela, Mandy, Sarah and Lucy. It was lovely - Deirdre and I were giggling so much! The food was FIT. I kept on thinking about leaving this town in just over 2 months, and it made me so sad. The girls still don't know - it's going to be so hard telling them, especially Deirdre and Julia who are really good friends. I think I'm going to have to tell them soon though.
Speaking of telling people - I'm telling Rebecca's mum and Louis's mum this week that I'm a) pregnant b) moving to Kent c) no longer looker after their children from July. EEEEK! Talk about a triple whammy. This is also not going to be easy but I'm determined to do it THIS WEEK. *grits teeth*
We went to Rugby on Saturday to see Buzz (Jacqui) and Meat (Mark). It was lovely. William loved all the space in their house and he especially loved their cats ('tats')! I had a special pregnancy massage on Saturday which was bliss too, whilst Mike and Sausage fed the ducks!
Money is a little concern at the moment, which it hasn't been for ages actually. I'm not really tutoring enough and I need to do more. A lot of my students disappeared over the Easter break. It's just about ok I think at the moment.......
Went to Big Fun soft play this morning which was great fun except for a screaming Rebecca. So this afternoon I think I'm just going to stay in. It's a bit wet and yuck out there. I need to get some more at-home activities for William - he seems a bit bored of everything at the moment.
I'm thinking:
1) sticklebricks
2) paints
3) felt-tip pens - he loves drawing
4) eeerrmm......

I've been sweating the small stuff waaaaaaay too much recently. Getting stressed about little, unimportant things. I'm not doing that anymore. I also always have a very small, very vague sense of anxiety about something, permanently there in the background - no matter how chilled and relaxed and happy I am. I need to get rid of that somehow. For the most part though, I'm happy and sunny and positive and YAY!
Right, William's been asleep for 1 hr 10 mins - better do some washing up and stuff!

It's a.............:-D

......................GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!
Seriously-I can't believe it's true! I can't believe I could be that lucky! A GIRL!!!!!!!!!! A GIRL!!!!! Woweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!
The scan went really, really well. Importantly, the baby is doing great and spot on in terms of measurements etc. Initially the cord was between the baby's legs and I looked at it and thought 'wow, that's a giant willy!'. But then once it had moved she said that it 'looked like a little girl' and that she thought she could see LABIA!!! My eyes actually filled with tears when she said that - I couldn't believe it!!!! No matter how much I tried to deny it to myself.........I really would love a little girl!
The thing is, I know mistakes do happen and people are told the wrong things in scans. I don't want to go crazy buying pink stuff - just in case! But............mistakes are rare, surely?! Oh my GOSH!!!!!
It certainly explains why I've been so poorly this pregnancy with all the sickness etc. And I just had a girl vibe from early on. Just goes to show - instincts are often right!
Anyway - just came on to tell my dear diary the fabulous news!! Off to Rugby this weekend-YAY!! xxxx

And breathe

A rather stressful morning.
Rebecca has screamed like a banshee for most of it. She cries at everything - when I try to leave the room, when I go upstairs, when William so much as taps her..........it's so wearying and I feel myself boiling up with rage as her cry just goes straight through me, it's hideous. I never thought I'd feel such anger towards a child.
I can't bear this job any longer. This stress is not good for my health.
We went for a lovely walk in the sun this morning to the pharmacy and shop to buy Pregnacare, toothbrushes, and envelopes. I'm really not feeling that patient with William this morning though either-not sure why. When he tried to draw on the radiator with felt-tip pens I was not impressed.
My throat is better. Major drama with my brother yesterday! He rang from Chicago for some 'sisterly advice' - I found that really touching! He's been dating his girlfriend Becky on and off for aaaaaages - about 7 years or something. But in Chicago he's met a new girl, Erin, who is really into sports and much more like him. So Becky came out to visit him last Sunday and he basically realised he had to finish with Becky - which he did last night after I'd talked to him. But of an EEK situation but I think he's done the right thing.
And Mike's brother's fiance had a baby yesterday by c-section! It's called Brandon....not sure about the name at all, reminds me of Beverly Hills 90210 but hey!!!!!
3 days til the scan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yet more illness!

Hurumph. I'm in a really chipper mood today but I seem to have come down with yet another bloody illness. I have a really painful throat - it's like swallowing razor blades! - all my glands are up and I feel shattered. I really, really hope it's not the same thing that Deirdre had, as that lasted for 3 weeks!!!!!!
Fight it off!! Fight it off! Lemon & ginger tea, bizarrely, is really helping. But what I actually need is a nice fat dose of Nurofen, or a lemsip. Being ill when pregnant really, really sucks.
To be honest, I'd much rather it me be ill than William - and he's soooooo much better. We had a lovely weekend in Bristol (apart from a few stressful moments when I could really have done with Mike....).
Anyway. I'm having a kick-ass day, doing housework and all sorts. I need to take William and Rebecca out today when they wake up but I really don't feel like it. Might brave the park - but jeez, I'm so bored of that place. Hmmmm........

Quickie

.....I'm off to Bristol this morning to see my dear friends! Mike's on a boys weekend. Booooo. I hate it when we don't spend the weekend together. It hardly ever happens to be honest. But I look after William all week, and it's nice to have someone to help out at the weekend.
Anyway! Brief bullets...........
1) Mini-cookie is kicking LOADS at the moment. I love it! So reassuring. Also am looking very very pregnant.....and I'm only 19 weeks!!!!
2) 20 wk scan next Friday. Very excited!!! I'm getting a little obsessional over the whole boy/girl thing - just like I did with William. Yes, I want a girl - I'd love a daughter, and this is going to be my last pregnancy so this really is last chance saloon. But I don't want to be disappointed if we discover it's a boy. Because that's really horrid. I really wish I hadn't told everyone I was rooting for a girl - are they going to feel like they have to offer condolences if we find out it's a boy??? At the end of the day a healthy baby is all that matters! I know that deep down!
3) William is slowly getting better thanks to antibiotics. He's still really tired though and slept til 9.15am yesterday!! Madness. After he woke up we met up with Deidre and went to Boulters Lock to feed the ducks. William loved it and quacked like mad - especially when they took bread from his hand! He thought it was hilarious! I just hope he's not going to be ratty today or that will make for a stressful afternoon.
4) He's sleeping right now, which means he'll be awake for the entire car journey to the south west....YIKES!
5) Mike sent me flowers yesterday. They're beautiful and the note says what a wonderful wife and mother I am. I have a very romantic, wonderful husband! We spent the evening snuggled up watching Greys Anatomy and Romeo and Juliet....I must have seen that movie about a million times, but I still cry at the end!

Ok that's it. I'll be going in about an hour probably. Toodlepip for now!

Weird

William's having his longest nap ever and it feels weird. He's been asleep since 12 and it's now just gone 3.30pm!!! His previous longest was just under 3 hours. There's a reason for it: my poor little man has not only an ear infection, but also a chest infection. We went to the docs this morning after it was clear that he was very poorly this morning. I think he's had this all week but it really came out in full throttle today!
I'm just a little concerned that..........ooooh! He's awake. Gotta go....continue later xxxxxxxxxxxx

Flat

I feel really flat and a little low this morning.
It's the Easter holiday here in Maidenhead, so no Tuesday morning playgroup. :-( Or Thursday morning playgroup. Or MAD music class on Friday...........for 2 weeks!! Bleugh.
We stayed in all day yesterday and it was a loooooooooooong afternoon. Poor Sausage was clingy and out of sorts and brought me book after book to read. He didn't really want to play or anything. Louis was subdued too, and Rebecca......well, she was just her normal pain-in-the-ass self.
I went to bed at 8.50pm after having just soup for dinner and my tummy seems normal now....touch wood. William had a temperature on and off all night which I soothed with infant ibuprofen. He's not right this morning either and went for his nap at 10am....so much earlier than normal.
It's a week since he had the MMR, and he's been ill on and off ever since. They said the main effects occured a week after the jab....which is today. But it's irritating as before the jab he was completely healthy; no colds or anything. He now has: a temperature, a cold, a cough, and gunky eyes! I'm totally pro-vaccine, and he definitely had to have it, but he seems to have had a particularly unpleasant reaction to it. I feel like I'm giving him loads of calpol and ibuprofen-which I'm not really-but how else can I bring his temperature down and make him comfortable?
I hate staying in the house. It's going to get harder & harder for me to go into town etc as I get bigger, as the hill I have to walk up is a killer.....so I think I'll be staying in a lot more before we move. Which is a miserable thought. I'm yearning to move to Whitstable. I just think things will be so much easier over there. 3 months............
And I can't WAIT to stop f*cking childminding. I hate, hate, HATE this job. And I suck at it. I hate doing something I suck at. I was a bloody good teacher. This......is just not me.
Also Mike's off to see his friends this weekend - which is fair enough, he hasn't done that for ages. I'm seeing my uni friends in Bristol, which would be lovely except I fell out with one of them a month ago (long story) and we're supposed to be going over to visit her and the baby on Saturday. For the sake of group harmony, and so it won't be really awkward on Saturday, I need to ring her and say let's just forget about it....but it's a difficult call to make and I really can't be bothered. It wouldn't bother me if I never saw her again - she does my head in and is no kind of friend really. I think I'll do it tomorrow or Thursday. I really can't be arsed today.
So that's why I'm flat today. I wish my mum was just round the corner (she will be in July when we move!). It's a beautfiful day. So what to do with the children after lunch? I could go to the park, or attempt a trip into town to the library?? I'm thinking park. It's close, and we could always go for a nice walk afterwards. I really can't face that walk into town!